When I Learned That Problems Are Not Always Problems, It Changed My Life


The Three Battlefields: Endure, Avoid, Attack - How to Conquer Your Problems Like a Master

Life throws punches, that's a fact.

Problems come in all shapes and sizes, from a leaky faucet to navigating a career change.

But have you ever noticed some problems seem to disappear on their own, while others linger like a bad smell, and some you just can't wait to tackle?

There's a reason for that.

Here's the secret most people miss.

There are actually three types of problems:

  • the ones you endure
  • the ones you avoid
  • the ones you actively seek

Mastering this distinction is the difference between feeling like a ship tossed in a storm and a captain navigating the sea with confidence.

Let's break down these battlefields, warrior, so you can become the master of your own destiny.

Battlefield 1: The Stoic Warrior - Problems You Endure

Some problems are like bad weather – inevitable and beyond your control.

A loved one gets sick, the market takes a downturn, your car breaks down.

These are the endurance tests of life.

Here, the key is acceptance and stoicism, a philosophy practiced by Roman warriors who learned to control their emotions in the face of hardship.

  • Focus on what you can control: You can't control the rain, but you can control your reaction. When the inevitable happens, don't waste energy fighting the storm. Instead, focus on what you can control – your attitude, your actions, and how you choose to respond.
  • Develop mental toughness: Imagine yourself as a seasoned construction worker building through a blizzard. You can't stop the weather, but you can keep working towards your goal. Develop mental tools like meditation or journaling to build resilience and weather the storm.
  • Find the silver lining: Even in the toughest situations, there's often a lesson to be learned. Maybe it's the importance of saving for a rainy day (pun intended) or the strength of your family bonds. Look for the hidden opportunities to grow within the challenge.

Action Steps:

  • Practice mindfulness. Take a few deep breaths in stressful situations.
  • Write down the things you can and can't control. Focus on the former.
  • Reflect on past challenges. What did you learn from them? How did you overcome them?

Battlefield 2: The Agile Ninja - Problems You Avoid

Some problems are like potholes on the road – easily avoidable with a little foresight.

Maybe it's a toxic friend who constantly drains your energy or a bad habit that's holding you back.

These problems are often self-inflicted or stem from poor choices.

Here, the key is prevention and agility.

  • Identify your triggers: Just like a martial artist learns to recognize an opponent's moves, learn to recognize situations that cause problems. Is it skipping breakfast that leads to afternoon crashes? Are there certain people who drain your energy?
  • Develop preventative measures: Once you identify the triggers, set up roadblocks. Avoid those people, carry snacks to avoid energy dips, or unsubscribe from tempting online shopping websites.
  • Learn from past mistakes: We all make them. The key is to analyze them and develop strategies to avoid repeating them. Did your impulsiveness lead to a bad financial decision? Maybe set up automatic transfers to savings or use a budgeting app.

Action Steps:

  • Make a list of problems you consistently face.
  • Identify the triggers that lead to those problems.
  • Develop and implement strategies to avoid those triggers.

Battlefield 3: The Relentless Samurai - Problems You Seek

Finally, there are problems that aren't problems at all, but rather challenges waiting to be conquered.

These are opportunities for growth, adventures waiting to unfold.

Maybe it's learning a new skill, starting your own business, or asking someone out on a date.

Here, the key is initiative and relentless pursuit.

  • Embrace discomfort: Growth occurs outside your comfort zone. Don't shy away from challenges – that's where the true rewards lie.
  • Set ambitious goals: Like a skilled martial artist who constantly seeks to improve, set ambitious goals that push you to become the best version of yourself.
  • Take action, every day: Don't wait for the "perfect" moment. Take small, consistent steps towards your goals every single day. Remember, a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.

Action Steps:

  • List down 3 challenges you want to conquer (learning a new language, running a marathon, etc.).
  • Break down each challenge into smaller achievable milestones.
  • Schedule daily actions that lead you toward your goals.

Remember, warrior, mastering these battlefields is a lifelong journey.

There will be setbacks, that's life.

The difference is that warriors and leaders do not let the setbacks set them back, they use them to spring forward to new heights.

Charles Doublet

Helping young men to become warriors, leaders, and teachers. Showing them how to overcome fear, bullies, and life's challenges so they can live the life they were meant to live.

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