Lead Yourself First, Brother:
The Key to Unlocking Your Power

Life throws a lot at you, leader.

There will be good times and bad times, opportunities and challenges.

Believe me, I know your pain because I was there too.

Decades ago, and 1000s of miles earlier, I was struggling in life.

But the one thing that determined how I navigated it all was my ability to lead myself.

Here's the hard truth.

If you don't learn to stand on your own two feet, you'll always be at the mercy of others.

Bullies, yes, but also those who coast on titles and positions of power, barking orders without a real clue.

They'll tell you what to do, where to go, and how to live your life.

But there's another way, brother.

A way where you call the shots.

You set the course.

This is the power of personal leadership.

It's about taking charge of your life, not waiting for someone else to do it for you.

Think of it like building a house.

You wouldn't start with the roof, would you?

No, you lay the foundation first, strong and steady.

Personal leadership is your foundation.

Once it's solid, you can build anything you set your mind to – success, happiness, a life you're proud of.

So, how do you become this leader of yourself?

Here are the tools I needed in my toolbox:

1. Know Your Values:
Your Compass in the Storm

Values are your north star, leader.

They're the core principles that guide you, the things that matter most in your life.

Maybe it's honesty, hard work, helping others, or creating something meaningful.

Whatever they are, knowing your values is crucial.

Imagine you're lost at sea.

Without a compass, you're just drifting.

But with your values as your guide, you can navigate any storm life throws your way.

Ask yourself.

What kind of person do I want to be?

What do I stand for?

What matters more than anything else?

Write your answers down.

Keep them close.

They'll be your guiding light.

When I was younger and trying to figure out who the hell I was and where I wanted to go in life, I made a list of my core values.​

Not only that, I defined each of them in my own words, what they meant to me.

I carried that list in my wallet, reading it at lunch, reminding myself of who I was growing into.

And every time an opportunity or crisis occurred to me, I would look to my list for insight on how to respond.

2. Set Goals:
Your Map to Success

Once you know your values, it's time to set some goals.

Goals are your roadmap, leader.

​Your blueprint.​

They show you where you want to be and how to get there.

But don't aim for some distant mountaintop.

Start small, achievable.

Maybe you want to learn a new skill, get in better shape, or save some money.

Write down your goals.

Make them clear and specific.

Then, here's the key: break them down into bite-sized chunks.

​Daily actions you can take, no matter how small.​

One pushup every day.

Reading a chapter of a book.

Putting away a few bucks each week.

These small wins add up, leader.

They build momentum and keep you moving forward.

Early on I realized that there were a few things I needed to live a successful life;

• a healthy body
• a healthy career
• healthy relationships

Toward that, each and every day I did my best in three areas, developing the keystone habits that influenced my habits and daily life.

• I trained in hapkido every day, to build confidence, strength, resilience
• I saw my work as an electrician through the lens of a craftsman, willing to put my name on everything I did, challenging myself to always do my best work
• I took classes, read books, hired therapists and had deep emotional conversations with friends and family to strengthen all of my important relationships

3. Emotional Energy Audits:
Clean Out the Negativity and the Noise

Your life is full of people, places, and activities.

Some will lift you up, some will drag you down.

It's your job, leader, to be ruthless about where you invest your energy.

Just like you wouldn't put bad gas in your truck, don't waste your time on negativity.

Take a regular emotional inventory.

Ask yourself: who and what drains my energy?

Who fills me with inspiration?

Be honest.

Then, make some tough choices.

Distance yourself from negative influences.

Surround yourself with positive people who support your goals.

It's not about being mean, it's about protecting your energy for what matters.

About 20-25 years ago, I did my first big energy audit.

I tracked all of the people, places, and activities that I participated with during a 2-week period.

Then I "scored" them on a scale of 1-5 on how I felt that they were an investment into my future self or a happy experience for my present self.

Anything that wasn't a 4 or 5, I ruthlessly eliminated, or at the very least, minimized.

To be honest, some of those relationships were hard to break off, they were good people or places, they just weren't supporting my present or future self.

It was tough but I never regretted those decisions.

Leading Yourself Isn't Easy, But It's Worth It

There will be days you stumble, leader.

Days you doubt yourself.

That's okay.

I did.

Everyone does it.

But the important thing is to keep getting back up, dust yourself off, and keep moving forward.

Remember, small steps every day lead to big results.

Learning to lead yourself is the toughest but most rewarding challenge you'll ever face.

It takes discipline, focus, and a willingness to take responsibility for your own life.

But the rewards are endless.

You'll gain confidence, build resilience, and unlock your true potential.

You'll open doors to opportunities you never dreamed of.

Most importantly, you'll find a happiness that comes from knowing you're in control, living a life that aligns with your values, and becoming the best version of yourself.

So take charge, leader.

Lead yourself first.

The world awaits.

And if you're ready to level up your game, reach out to me, let's see if we can create a new and improved blueprint and roadmap.